just some things

I.
the story
im like a little story
being written every day
and, somehow or other,
before i started on my way.
sometimes im reading far ahead
and turning pages fast
and other times i stop instead
wishing to go back.
but back is not an option
when youre on page 93--
"read one sentence at a time
and please like what you see"
"only 4000 pages more," you say
"so please dont be discouraged.
the writer isnt stuck, you know
so please dont lose your courage."
"things may happen in the end
and you will be surprised
but it will all end well, you see, so send
the publishing rights."
well, just tell me to keep reading
and not get bored and stop
or borrow everyone else's books
to see if they're on top.
"your story's yours [and mine]; please stay.
if you go, i guess its done.
except--your story's beautiful,
so please dont run away."

II.
steps to contentment
1. allow thyself to complain of nothing, not even the weather.
2. never picture thyself under any circumstance in which thou art not.
3. never compare thy own lot with that of another.
4. never allow thyself to dwell on the wish that this or that had been, or were otherwise
than it was / is. God almighty loves thee better and more wisely than thou dost thyself.
5. never dwell on the morrow. remember--it is Gods, not thine. the heaviest part of
sorrow is often the look forward to it. "the Lord will provide."

III.
theres this george mcdonald quote that says something like
'if we are to be born again, we must wake our souls an unnumbered times a day, and urge ourselves to life."
but i wonder if the problem, at least sometimes, is not the fact that my soul is sleeping, but rather my soul is numb. perhaps by sleeping, he means numb, i dont even know. but i have a rather strong feeling that my heart simply needs breaking. most peoples hearts do need a good breaking or two, i feel rather sure.

my mind is too small and im scared to pieces i think, about nearly everything.
so: break my heart; wreck my life.
[yes, i am terrified of this too. but you can even take longer than 3 weeks. ill [try to]wait.]
and your gentle hand will be felt in the aftermath, so i shall try to be brave.

IV.
speaking of love(of
which Who knows the
meaning;or how dreaming
becomes

if your heart's mind)i
guess a grassblade
Thinks beyond or
around(as poems are

made)Our picking it. this
caress that laugh
both quickly signify
life's only half(through

deep weather then
or none let's feel
all)mind in mind flesh
In flesh succeeding disappear.

[who even knows about love?]

V.
not a surge of worry, not a shade of care, not a blast of hurry touch the spirit there.
---
we may trust him fully, all for us to do. they who trust him wholly, find him wholly true.
---
stayed upon Jehovah, hearts are fully blest, finding, as he promised, perfect peace and rest.




VI.
" w o n d e r ...

VII.
...and p e r i s h."

Posted 7/17/2005 5:17 PM