the study of isaiah at bsf was very good for me. many things to learn here, and although every single study thus far has directly effected my life in some tell-able way, this was perhaps the most...personal. it dealt with My sin, My idols, My lack of get-up-and-go (of the spiritual variety, well, and the other varieties too) and so many promises God made to Me. it is far too unusual feeling to be dealing with God so directly. it hurts, in a good way (mostly) but i want more anyway. like eustance, peeling away his dragon skin.
the narnia movies are just not that good, by the way. as if you didnt know that already i just read them all again lately, and was reaffirmed in my new decision to try to read them at least every 18 mo. actually i still need to finish the magicians nephew. it got lost halfway through, and its kindof a bummer to be hanging out in the middle of a book for so long.
isnt it funny to be waiting for things? i am waiting for many things right now, and i don't know whether i should be working on them, and thinking about them (trying not to worry, i know.) and planning for them, or just...waiting. waiting is hard, and i think i am also learning to have empathy with others, who are waiting for harder things than i am. its just such a limbo state, and the thing about being in a limbo state, is that the game of limbo is not just super fun, and so to be stuck in that state is not necessarily awesome. i wonder who came up with the game of limbo?
i want to try to write here at least sometimes, so that i can remember. a little stone monument, if you will. its a little thing i can offer, which is not much: this meager sacrifice of words. but i do hope it will be multiplied and harvested even up to 100x.
jed and i are working to have less meaningless internet time; perhaps that will force me back here? that would be a positive. although, i may switch to wordpress, but my goodness, what a pain that is, because i have to change Everything over, because i hate having all of everything scattered all over the internet, even though i don't mind it in real life. something else i need to work on, dont remind me.
one of the other things i am learning is how to cook. i do not actually want to know how to cook, but it has become apparent that someone in this family needs to know how and
The lot was cast and then I drew,
alas. it was me, indeed. although, i will say that jed is getting to be an even better GRILLMASTER. mmmm. unfortunately on my end, its not going quite so well. although i can make deviled egg with the best of them (i like them plain and delicious, just like i like my men ??? i dont think jed is plain, though.) and my asparagus cooking has improved leaps and bounds i tell you. other than that, its a little on the sketchy side. its not for a diet, though, its for a LIFESTYLE. thats what i keep telling myself. and its a lifestyle where i can eat good, healthy things that God made, like God made them plus some chocolate chips on the side. whats so bad about that? isnt it a funny thing to realize that God was right all along? it shouldn't be a surprise, but sometimes it is. and he made everything to work so perfecly...just like babies. oh my goodness, babies.
